This isn’t a blog meant to define who I am—it’s an invitation to reflect on where we find ourselves in the journey of parenting young people.
Parenting often feels like our purpose, our focus, and even when it’s exhausting, it becomes our raison d’être. Yet, as our children grow, the constant demands of care diminish. Suddenly, the space and time we once craved arrive, bringing gaps where we are less needed physically but more involved emotionally.
Instead of daily tasks requiring our full attention, we find ourselves waiting—for the next request, the next drop-off, or the next pickup. These moments between demands grow quieter, offering us more time to think. However, these periods can feel empty, like a void needing to be filled. The space in our minds, once consumed by others’ needs, is now unsettlingly quiet.
This transition is rarely spoken of with depth. Society labels it as “midlife” or “the menopause,” implying we just need to muddle through it. But the reality is more complex. The shift sneaks up over years, and suddenly, we’re here—letting go of the years spent nurturing and anticipating others’ needs.
Letting go isn’t easy. It’s a process of grief and loss—letting go of the identity we’ve built as involved parents. It’s a daily challenge to embrace the platitudes about newfound “freedom,” especially when we still feel the loss of joy, pride, and even the angst that came with being so integral to our children’s lives.
I can’t predict your journey as you transition from the active, hands-on role of parenting. But what I can do is guide you. We can guide one another.
If you don’t have a space to share your true feelings about these changes, let’s create one together. I’m here to listen and support, with honesty, integrity, and a commitment to building a supportive community. A space where parents can feel heard, held, and validated in this shared experience.
I’d love to hear your reflections. Email me clare@clarecogan.com and let’s chat.
Love, Clare x